As his “frail” body steps with eyes surrounding him in question, I look up to the heavens and pray that society teaches our young about disabilities. For we will not stay behind closed eyes.

 

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Change

We bring change when we only want to provide it in our lives. This next month is going to be trying for me. As I get closer to the date of remembering my son’s and daughters accident I want to accept what I cannot change. I want to learn that what I have been given is a blessing and have happiness and strength. There are so many demons and hateful things that can surround us and it isn’t easy for us to stay away from them, especially when you feel they affect you. But after looking at things I have come to realize that they dont. They don’t affect me or what happens in my life. What affects me is what “i” do as a person. I will be posting everyday on this close journey and expressing the feelings of pain, heartache, joy and happiness. I WILL find the strength to accept and move to a better place. For he needs me.

Leadership

Leadership is not judgemental. It does not complain. It does not lower the inspired. It does not wallow in misery. It does not hold grudges. It does not show jeaousy or lack of pride. It promotes. It teaches. It strives for strength it it’s team. It provides s
trength in itself, in its individual team embers and understands that mistakes will occur. It leads.

Slice of Life

So so thing I thought I would do here also is talk about one of my passions. Food. As I go to different places I’ll be critiquing the place and the food. So let’s start.

Tonight we drove to to Wilmington NC and we stopped by a local pizzeria called Slice of Life. Walking into the facility it was a nice atmosphere we sat ourself. The facility looked like we should have been greeted. Very nice. We waited about 5 minutes then we were approached by a well mannered gentleman. He had obviously what looked like 6 tables and the service was great. Food, we order nachos…these were mounded but dry. They were lacking something. Quesadilla, was ridiculous. This thing came out looking like a calzone. It was great. Pizza wasn’t the best. Crust was hand tossed and great but the sauce…mmm..not sure.
Cesaer salad was great. Fresh with great parmesan..you could really taste the anchovies. Over all food I give a 2/5 and everything else..5..

Maybe next time we will try a signature pizza

When you think you want to give up.

Over the last few days I’ve battle a lot of concerns. A son who is disabled from a car accident who can’t express his feelings, to a husband that doesn’t understand how to assist him, to a daughter who went through her first possible break up with a boy to my personal concerns with weight, college and separations.

You see, I’m a retired Marine, and challenges are simple to me. I’ve overcome my fears and fought obstacles that most women could never believe. But this past week, really kicked my butt.

My husband and I can’t seems to find the time to stop and listen to one another so out of all this…I’ve decided
with like everything else to take action.

Tonight after the long meeting with my professor I’ll be sitting down with a great bottle of wine, a set of handcuffs and a chair. We both will be handcuffed to chairs and have to talk to one another…I’ve ll let our know how this goes. 🙂

First day of the rest of your life

It sometimes seems that everyday as I sit and prepare for the day, I say “Man. Not again today.” The same things happening the same routines. Up at 4pm drive an hour to work, work all day then drive back only to be brought home to a broken family. This of course is what I see. My husband on the other hand. Sees life. He sees happiness. Not always complete but he is a great wonder. He can make a horrible situation turn into flowers and roses.

Today. I say this regularly by the way. Today is the day that “I” begin my new life. Conquer the fears of my son not being loved, not being accepted, not being able to do the things ordinary people do. I accept this.

I can remember Mother’s Day 2007 like it was the back of my hand. This is the day the doctors asked, “Do you know who and when we will be pulling the plugs?” This wasn’t about pulling a tube to stop feeding. This was about stopping the life of my 3 year old son. I couldn’t do it. I just couldnt. In my mind God gave me him and God would have to take him away. I prayed. I prayed like no other. Telling him that if he decided to give him back to me, I would accept the challenge that he gave me. No matter what or how my son and the situation turned out. And so. Weeks later..my son blinked.

That’s all I had to begin with. A simple flicker of the eye lashes. Everything else in his body was lifeless. Days went by and the docs said he would be a vegetable the rest of his life. I just couldn’t bare it. So. I said the most powerful word ANYBODY  old ever say. NO!

I refused to give in. I refused to give up. I pushed him and myself to limits that I never thought we could do. And I’m proud of that. So today, I will repay him. I will not give up. I will begin this day as the first day of MY new beginning.

When your world changes

There really isn’t a way to ever explain how it feels to see one of your children destroyed or mangled from a car accident. You pray your heart out and wish for only the best in their life. This blog is about my journey. My journey as a mother, a wife, a United States Marine. Here we will explore life. My life, your life, the questions of strength. I’m not a professional writer just someone who has a passion to say the truth. Speak the things that we as women don’t want to accept. I hope you join me on my journey and find that during this journey the angel is always on your right side. 🙂